We often find ourselves throughout our day feeling that we are in themiddle of a tornado. We have been pulled every which direction from our husbands, our work both inside and outside of the home and the day to day demands of answering to "Momma Momma..." When do we find time to stop and take a breath. When do we find time to sleep in late, eat cereal all day and not worry about feeding others or have time to just be. If you work outside of the home, it is hard sometimes to switch hats from career woman to mother. If you are a stay-at-home mom, it's hard to find those breaks in your day where you wind down. Motherhood is a 24-hour/7 day a week job, that doesn't usually have sick days, vacation time or half-days.
However, it has been shown that when we, the mommas, are happy, relaxed and well rested, our children and families are happier. Think about it, those of you with older children, remember the first night that newborn slept through the night. That was the best sleep. Remember how much more focused you were the next day. We as women have to set aside time for ourselves so that we aren't mad at the world. I know this is hard because we by nature are nurturers but we have to start some where to reduce our stress.
Try these out:
Read a good fiction book...one of my girlfriends always says you need fiction in your lives
Take a long bath, with candles, music and bath salts.....make sure the kids are safe even if you have to do it after they are asleep.
Exercise or at least go for a walk, Google stroller stride in your area if you can't find a sitter. There are groups on babyzone.com for your local area that get together to exercise with smaller children. If you have older children join the YMCA or YWCA, they can take a class while you exercise.
Write a letter to a friend....not an email, sit down and physically write a letter
Go get your hair done something about having someone else wash and style you hair is so relaxing, like washing stress down the drain. On a budget, get a mani or pedicure.
Schedule down time or your own time out, if it is locking your office door at work or sitting on your porch, turn off the phones and sit for 10 minutes. If you can't sit with yourself for 10 minutes imagine what other people think about being around you for that long.
What are some ways you find time for yourself?
Hopefully this blog will help reduce the stress too. Our children are blessings from God and we can give them what they need if we don't first take care of ourselves so that we can be our best.
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About Me
- Lori
- I am a stay at home mother who left the work place almost four years ago. I have a M.A. in Clinical Psychology and have worked as a therapist with children and their families. I have two beautiful daughters and a wonderful husband who is now a full time minister.
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5 comments:
I can definitely attest to the woes of juggling family life, work life and social life. I am an executive, 8 months pregnant and have a three year old son. My husband is a minister of music and just recently went back to school to get his degree in Philosophy and Religious Studies. One thing I can say is that prayer works. Lord knows its gets me through my days, afternoons and nights. The other thing I would say that works well is utilizing those moments when your kids are napping to rest yourself. Sounds easy right?....not if your like me who was notorious for using that time to "get stuff done". There will never be a time where you will have nothing to do so rest while your baby is resting...lay down, take a bath, read a book, drink some tea and watch a movie. Just do nothing. By the time your kids wake up you will be refreshed and ready to go.
I myself find it hard to find time for myself. With two small children, a husband, and a full time career, I loose sight on my sanity. There have been days when I could not wait to go to sleep. Then there are days when I am driving home from work and I just want to keep driving somewhere, anywhere but home. But the Lord, He is good. He always reminds me of the blessings that I have in my family and for that I am greatful. My mom watches my kids periodically so I can have some me-time. But for the days I have the children I enjoy the peace when they are sleep. I just listen to some music, watch tv, read and sleep when they are sleep. Anything to give myself a break. I also find driving to work and talking to the Lord is also relaxing and uplifting. These are just a couple of things that I do on a regular basis to keep my head on straight.
I laughed when I actually began trying to count how many times my now 6 year old daughter said Momma, Momma in one day...from the 6 a.m. hour with a break of 1st grade school then picked back up from 2:15 p.m. till bed time. I thought I would scream, but what I have found helpful is to rest when she is resting especially during the summer months when she is at home. I have seen change in her independance and ability to play by herself when I say "Momma" needs a little break. Or she will climb in the bed with me and we will read. Believe it or not it is also relaxing. But either way you slice it motherhood is a blessing and a huge challenge at the same time. Especially if you are a conscious mother who wants to raise productive and self-reliant children who by the way know who they are and who know God. It is hard, but keep it moving and lean on other mothers for support who truly understand what you are going through. Love the men, but they have no clue! Blessings my sistas.
I have 5 children. Although the youngest is 10, I do find myself juggling family life, work life and social life. It gets better when your children get older, but you do have to find the time to wind down. During the school year my children have a set bedtime and I usually wind down by reading a book, taking a long hot bath and watching tv. Often there are times when it seems there are not enough hours in the day to even wind down. But as my mother always says you have to make time for yourself to rejuvinate.
I have 4 boys. Ages 23, 19, 16, and 14. The earlier years were truly wonderful, different with each one but all were good. The older they got the more I realised that consistent structure is very important for them as well as yourself. My boys said momma so much that I wondered how they knew who or what momma was. I found that if you are a working mother, if possible, request a earlier work schedule. That way you can get off work earlier and get some things done before getting them from daycare/school. I found that reading scriptures to help me with strength before going into the building for work and sitting in my car during lunch reading more scripture (15 minutes reading, 15 eating, 20 nap)would keep me positive throughout the day. Those were the good old days. Another thing, don't sleep in on the weekend, it will throw you off on Monday. It is ok to let them mess up, teach them to clean up while singing the Barney clean up song. Stay consistent for your sanity and their well being.
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